Played by: David Walliams Catchphrase: "Wicky Woo!", "Top of the morning, where's me breakfast?" Appearances: Radio Show; Series 1, and Little Britain Live
Des Kaye is a one-time children's TV host who works in a DIY store. He is in denial and hasn't come to terms with the fact he is no longer on TV. He is often seen annoying the other members of staff with his puppet (called Croc O'Dile) and his frequent sayings of "wicky woo". The Series 1 DVD contains a deleted scene showing Des visiting a children's hospital and accidentally unplugging a patient's life support machine while trying to play some cheerful music on a tape recorder. He appears on the radio series, and even makes it into the best of Little Britain Radio show 2-disc set. According to the Radio series, he was sacked from his "Fun Bus" show because of gross indecency (saying "Are you telling me you've never had a wank in the toilet?"). One of the new employees at DIY universe where Des was working at the time claims that he and his sister watched the show during its run and revealed that a girl lost an eye on the show.
Des Kaye also made an appearance on the live show, making him one of only 2 characters to have had their last appearance on the show in series 1, the other being Ray McCooney. The act involved Des driving around in what is pressumably a miniature fun bus and angrily throwing lollipops at the audience. He then proceeds to play a game called "Hide the Sausage", which involves him taking 2 men from the audience at random, asking them to hide a large sausage on a random body part and then molest the contestant who he thinks has the sausage until a loud siren goes off. In the Australian tour, Walliams received a letter of complaint for this strong scene, he then claimed he would respond with an apology.